9 the book of bantorra

February is officially over. This last week, i spent . The entire month, i spent $69.27 -compared to my limit of $123.83. That's 56% of the given amount, averaging to $2.5 a day instead of $4.40.

I celebrated by spending $40 at Walbaum's today. I hope it lasts me at least 2 weeks. Knowing me, i might indulge and finish it one.

117 the brightness of worship

i don't recall many days like today where i actually enjoyed life even when i was not as productive in terms of schoolwork. i attended NYC Church at 11 and Trinity Grace Chelsea at 7. i enjoyed both services very much, especially since I was with Cooper people. I shall not summarize but for one thing, worship is a very different experience.

one more week til the end of february.

17 the moment becomes more scary every time i wonder

i'm embarrassed by the length but there is no other way. hope it comes as a good read: reprocessing the Gospel.

Let's assume God exists, which He does. Now, what's the point of God creating humans? (I assume humans exists as well, which they do.) I'm clearly biased and wish not to think of all the ridiculous possibilities, but I believe He created humans so that they can love God and love each other. It is part of His Being, His nature perhaps, that He must be worshiped. Loving Him is the ultimate form of worship. One may look at that and call God selfish, but one may also look at that and see that it benefits us as humans to worship God. We are made to worship so when we do so, it aligns with our soul, our purpose. This may also seem as predestination somewhat, but if we really are created by God, who are we to say how God should make us.

If we were to believe that God made us to love Him and to love each other, then we should also agree that God wants to reveal Himself to us. Otherwise, we wouldn't be worshiping Him if we do not know who He is. We also wouldn't know what love truly is. We wouldn't be able to love Him and love others. We often think we know a good bit of love, but God's love is entirely different. He speaks on loving your enemies, forgiving those who has hurt you, and sacrificing your life for the sake of others. These are acts that one cannot fully accomplish without first experiencing God's love.

So now, God wants to reveal Himself to us so we may learn love. How does He reveal Himself to us? I believe this is the perfect transition: http://januarythirtieth.blogspot.com/ This entry is becoming far too long.

713 two hours of class on a monday

for clarification purposes. my goal of $123.83 for the month of february is not to experience the life of those who live under two dollars a day. the experience comes as a side effect of it, in a positive way i suppose. the goal is simply to watch my spendings more closely and not spend as much money. also keeps me from indulging on food. i find it pretty hard living on less than $4 a day. it's sick to imagine how people do it.

i also realized that my splitting to $4.40 a day was based on 28 days, which is the month of february, but it was compared to january's 31 days. i technically had a 3 day advantage.

314 heading to forefront

One of the great uses of twitter and facebook will be to prove on the last day that prayerless was not from lack of time. -John Piper

this was twittered by some random guy. dwell upon that for a bit. it's not saying twitter and fb is necessarily bad. it's bad especially when your time is spent on these things rather than on seeking God. it doesn't simply extend to twitter and fb.

56 a girl named bellteppi

the theme's reoccurring.

it's not the end of the week yet, but i wish to update my status nonetheless. so one of my goals for the month of february is to spend HALF as much money I spent on food last month. January total was approximately $247.66. Half of that is $123.83. Divide that by 4 and you'd get $31 per week. Divide that by 7 and you'd have $4.40 per day.

M- $3, Tu- $0, W-$2.5, Th-$3. I must admit, i had a few granola bars and cereal which i didn't count towards the budget since they were purchased before February. Nonetheless, granola bars don't get you very far.

The average person in the world lives on less than $2 a day. Living expenses are different in other countries but still, i think $4.40 is somewhat equivalent, if not still an overestimate of what the AVERAGE person lives off. Trying to get a taste of what that's like, though i'm sure i'm still living WAY BETTER than those people do.

i'm definitely feeling the pain of not eating. i just need to watch out for my health at the same time.

26 one must not have two entries on the same day

breaking perfection, or more correctly, idealism.

School has become even more scary. The more I take my classes, the more I realize how scared I am to find out that chemical engineer might actually be boring. Either that, or it's hard. My classes seem intimidating this semester. I'm not sure why particularly. I feel behind and I have the tendency to blame teachers for their incompetence in teaching. That may simply be an excuse that I don't know my material. The subjects seem too overwhelming to study. Nonetheless, I will try my best to do well.

I need to cut off on recreational reading. It's terrible. I do so much reading that I become sick of it, and then when it comes to textbooks, I felt like I've read enough for the day. There's so many ideas to process already. I guess I shouldn't start new books. I don't see it happening. It's like a drug.

47 fossilized jellyfishes in australia

i have nothing on my mind to write except i feel guilty for not updating. that is all.