this was a day prior but it was one of those dreams. it felt more intense than previous though because the setting and everything was much more realistic. i don't recall much from it at all, but there was one thing i felt, or did not feel. sometimes i don't know if it's something mental or emotional but in that dream, i did not feel a bit of God's presence on this earth. for some reason, i was dead sure He did not exist. every part of me told me so. and that was crazy. once it dawned on me more and that there was nothing i can do about it, i was terrified. every bit of me was crying out for this to not be true.
perhaps this is what many people feel. and they've sooner or later grown used to it, adapted to it. they won't grow fully used to it but enough to not break down every so often. pride was their solution. warped minds and hardened hearts. perhaps this is the solution when one realizes there is no God. it's irrational though. one cannot be sure that there is no God. yet, one can experience the living God, similar to how one acknowledges that he has a family and friends and relationships. our God is very alive and real. it's a totally different story.
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