n. day 93 prayer, finding the heart's true home

i've been a poor steward of my time lately as i spent a good chunk of time yesterday doing what my friend Yushen would coin as "foolishness" in watching lots of cantonese movies. they all had a central theme of a love story like nearly every movie in the world. i've certainly picked up many stuff from these movies, but one that stood out was how love takes courage, perhaps something which i lack.

misfortunes of this week:
--broke my glasses while playing bball this past sat morning so i'm using my spare, which has scratched up lens.
--went all-you-can-bowl bowling two nights ago with my life group which was really fun but now my right arm is quite fatigued.
--broke my really comfortable pair of slippers yesterday.
--tried looking for my adv thermo professor this whole week but either he was busy or not in office. sent an email to make appointment too but he never replied.

highlights of this week:
--thanksgiving dinner at hmcc tonight! (some friends from mse are coming too)
--vball tourney this saturday with some aiv ppl!
--more time to study!

m. day 84`give myself away

Compelling was this past weekend at a hotel at Michigan State University. I enjoyed it for the most part. To be brief, I shall only share one thing I learned, or rather, one thing I believed more strongly. I was struck by the idea of how perhaps God's Sovereignty is tied to human prayers. Now, this is not because we have the power to control Him or anything, but it is because He chose to effect change on the earth this way. One of the common mentalities in prayer is that God is sovereign and all-powerful and He will do whatever He needs regardless of whether we take action or whether we pray or not. While this is still true of certain cases, the crazy thing is how He lets us affect the way He moves- that unless we pray, He won't take action. In this way, it actually brings Him more glory in the end for He uses imperfect, sinful, weak human beings to effect change on this earth. There's certainly more to prayer than this but I thought it was such an absurd yet beautiful thought, of how God uses the imperfect to accomplish His works for glory's sake and for love's sake, that we may be part of His story.

Actions taken/to take this week:
--started reading A Million Miles in a Thousand Years by Donald Miller again (really really good as with his other books)
--bought several books on prayer and wish to immerse myself with stories and mindset of prayer
--lots of work to catch up since I didn't do any this past weekend though it should be manageable
--trying to hang with or keep in connection with more people from aiv on a more consistent basis. chilling with Chris Chou for a little bit later on today.

l. day 76 another day of adventure seeking

The happiness of man hangs not on the enjoyment of life but on the fulfillment of his purpose. It's not to say one cannot enjoy life while carrying out his task, but to say that the aim of one is not to seek enjoyment and comfort and security. It's to take risks, experience failure, and be transformed into a more perfect being.

It was saturday of this weekend. Morning consisted of playing bball with asian iv people, afternoon was hanging out and watching my first UMich football game (we lost) at friend's place, then back home to get some hw done and eat, then volleyball with more friends from aiv and harvest. All were extremely enjoyable. But as I lied (laid?) in bed that night, I begin to feel a sense of emptiness. Perhaps it's because I haven't made a life breathed easier that day.

Highlights:
--found out two of my roommates, both white, watch anime. (???) had no idea. They were even watching Darker than Black, which is one of the really good anime that isn't too popular. (one actually went to an anime convention this weekend.)
--compelling (iv retreat) is this upcoming weekend so i'm quite excited.

k. day 73 so many classics to read

So tonight was the Veritas Forum. I didn't think it was particular good but I'm glad for the chance to invite my roommate and a colleague to come with me. I was a bit worried cause I had to engage both of them rather separately since one's a grad student and the other an underclassmen and both didn't know anyone else there. It turned out pretty fine and flourished some talk on religion. Both of them seem eager to get plugged into a church so I'm hoping strongly for that.

Anyways, it's Venus' birthday today but I don't think she reads this so whatever. Just thought I'd put it out there anyways. I started up working on her extremely late birthday present again and it's still quite a challenge but i've got more of a direction and will to advance in it. Still pessimistic about the outcome but whatever.